Thursday, November 03, 2005

PFSP-Day 13-Mental garbage and face to face transfer

Today we discussed the regions of the brain, which we use in speaking. Lots of highly technical jargon was thrown around, which I won’t get into here. We also discuss how our negative associations and conditioning affect our ability to apply our new skills.

For example, I have serious issues with the telephone. To me it’s an embarrassment machine, which I’m forced to use everyday just to get by. It causes major anxiety whenever I need to call anybody and I will procrastinate with a phone call for as long as I can get away with it. Sometimes it will take an entire day just to get up the nerve to make the call, and I’m exhausted at the end of the day.

As Lori, my therapist, would put it; “See, all that above … well that’s not helping.”. Basically, Lori says if you are doing your covert practice while waiting to speak, there is no room for any of the negative mental stuff. This makes total sense, but I find it really difficult to do it. Using this with the phone would be really helpful.

Also, I made an observation yesterday. I was talking to Lori, about how sometimes I can’t feel my targets, as I get faster. And that when I completed the course in 1993, I couldn’t really feel them at all. I realized what I was doing; I was simulating my controlled fluency voice like you might mimic an accent! That’s exactly what I was doing! That would also explain why sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t, since personally, I can’t just do a fake accent on the fly without getting in the mode first.

At about 11:00, we went to the Mall, where we proceeded to approach people working in the mall, and initiate speech. This would be in the form of a question, where the preferred answer is a simple easily completed answer .. like ‘No’.

My question was “Is there a CIBC in this mall?”. There wasn’t, so it was a good queston. It went smoothly, with a few exceptions. It really didn’t bother me too much.

By 1:00, I was in The Bay, buying a new hat, having a conversation with the cashier. I was even talking to other people in line. I was having my own little party. ;-) It felt damn good … I will say that! Normally, I keep my mouth shut and eyes on the floor, so nobody will initiate speech with me.

Unlike the phone transfer, which is not something I enjoy doing at all. Refer to paragraph 2. ;-)

Not meant as advice, please find a qualified therapist if you are interested in similar therapy.


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